My samsung Galaxy 3s is the tits. Like the good ones you like and not the bad ones you hate.

I was falling a bit behind in the smart-phone-keeping-up-with-the-joneses, actually probably more than a bit. I've had my iPhone 3g for 3 years. That's right not even a 3gS so I couldn't even get all the aps because my phone wouldn't support the newest operating system. I never upgraded my phone because I'm actually not an Apple fan. In fact I'm quite the opposite I think they give people rudimentary tech with a big price tag on it  and sell the hip factor. I also hate droopy toques and over sized eyeglasses.

The hatred for apple coupled with being locked into a 3yr contract with virgin (whom i recommend by the way) kept me skeptical and I never sipped anyone's kool-aid. That is until I tasted the Galaxy 3S kool-aid. That I drank deep and immediately.

As you know i am an avid hobby photographer, www.dalederuiter.com for the uninitiated, so the bigger higher definition screen of the 3S was what initially drew me in. Actually that's all it took to sell me. All I knew about the Galaxy's newest installment was it's size the rest I just knew would be awesome because it's an android phone and I have already pledged my allegiance to our new Google overlords.

In fact this phone is so awesome it's not even just a paultry smartphone. No that dank old moldy term can't even encapsulate how good this phone is. We are now on a whole nother level we're in fucking superphone land. There's unicorns, there's dragons and there's phones that transfer date when you goddamn touch tips.

That alone should have you throwing your teeny 4gS bullshit caveman smartphones into the sewer but what i am going to tell you next WILL FUCKING KILL YOU. With the Samsung galaxy 3s you can REPLACE THE BATTER AND GET MORE MEMORY.

That's right none more of this asshole go to the apple store complain about you phone not keeping a charge bullshit. Now you just take the back off your phone and then YOU JUST TAKE OUT THE BATTERY AND PUT IN A NEW ONE.

That's right we're back in the goddamn cell-phone salad days. The good old days where you call the shots. Where you decide when your $600 investment is going to die, which is NOT TODAY MOTHERFUCKER.

Oh what's that crybaby nerd in the back you heard that since the phone's CPU runs at an earth destroying pace with giant computer testicles and processing shaft that the battery runs down fast? Guess what the phone has a power saving mode where you muzzle that hard beast and it doesn't let the CPU run fast enough to drain the phone. You don't even notice the difference that's how good this phone is even half way IS ALL THE WAY.

The phone software is also highly customizable with a mind boggling plethora of motion controls that do wicked awesome things but if i tell you anymore of the pants shittingly good features of this phone I will have a seizure.

Just fucking buy it you idiot.

why i am no longer a professional graphic designer

As some of you know I quit my stable job, that I was very talented at, with the Calgary Sun. I liked the people there and I emjoyed the work I was doing. There was something bugging me though, something gnawing at the back of my mind. I wasn't going to reach my full potential there. Most importantly though I would never own a Porsche.

That infantile sentiment of materialism is just the tip of the guilt-ridden-being-poor-all-the-time-ice-burgh.  Everyone who knows me knows I'm chronically poor. Loving what you do for a living is not enough to make you truly happy. The hippies lied to you.

Don't worry this decision is not based entirely off me wanting a bigger bank account and a few shiny toys to show off. I figured it was about time I stopped and actually dealt with my impending future instead of putting it off. I just got sick of worrying about moving money around to pay my rent and then get phone calls from the student loan collectors saying my terrible credit is in jeopardy of getting worse.


Sure I am good at print design but unless you head is under a rock you've seen what's been happening to other out of date forms of media. Blockbuster, Sam The Recordman are just two examples of onetime giant companies imploding in on themselves. No matter how strong a product is if the populous doesn't want it then it dies. As the mediun dies then so do the means to create the message. 


I contemplated going to school to learn webdesign but I can't stand designing with code. It's like trying to bake cupcakes with a hammer. Besides if I have to go to school anyway why not learn a trade. They never go out of style and I can have a lucrative career in any place my nomad spirit takes me. Or when i get bored i can run away from my problems a little easier and with a teeny tiny safety net on the other end.


I've also decided I'm ready to not have a desk job for a while and I would like to have a job where I move around a bit. Turns out I'm not actually an inside cat. Maybe i'm not feral but nobody puts kitty in a corner. I grew up on a farm doing physical labor and as much as I hate to admit it deep down I like it. I had been going to the gym thinking I could get my muscle stretching needs there. Then again why waste over two hours working out when I can just mix it in with work and get paid for it.


Everyone keeps telling me I'll most likely loose wait. Really it's a good way to call me fat without calling me fat. Don't worry I am not so deep in a state of denial that I don't know what my body looks like. It is actually one of the reasons why I want a job where I'll have to sweat a bit--or a fuck tonne, you know, whatever. I might actually be able start plan GSGS or get skinny get sex. It's basically a plan where i loose weight and then ladies throw themselves at me... ok maybe there is some denial.

Duchess Says by Dale Deruiter (sled Island preview)

Sled Island will be the first time Duchess Says has been to calgary in almost five years. If you’ve done your math correctly you have already realised that this is the bands first Sled Island. Even if you weren’t around the last time they were here you should stand in line to help pop Duchess Says’ cherry for the biggest Indy musical festival in town. Mr. Besre had this to say of why you should make the effort to stop by whatever pub they happen to be at: “we make music that we want to listen to and we are genuine. Also Claude is a very kick ass performer.”

“I would like to shoot a machine gun.” Maybe Simon "Simon Says" Besre’s comment on what he is most excited to do when the montreal band graces Calgary with their presence for Sled Island was a bit ridiculous. His other reason is about as salient of a point as you can make, “I heard there are good beers in Calgary and I want to drink some.”

They may be Sled Island rookies but the band has been heartily festival seasoned by playing everything from SXSW to Pop Montreal. In fact the band is looking forward to playing Sled Island because “It is not as big of a circus as SXSW. There you feel like a little animal where you have to do your tricks and that’s all,” explains Besre.

Duchess Says isn’t coming to town empty handed, they bring their new album “In a Fung Day T!”, which was released last year. The follow up to 2008’s “Anthologies des 3 Perchoirs” is, as Besre put it, “more natural”. Don’t worry fans he ensures that the new material is a continuation of the music you already know and love.

Besre points out that the new album is more self contained since it was recorded in two weeks unlike their first album which “was three years of writing and recording here and there, it was more like an anthology”.

“The new album was a fast and easy process” Even though the “In a Fung Day T!” was recorded and mixed so fast the Besre assures that there was a lot of time spent writing the album and you can bet that the band will put their all into Sled Island because as Besre put it “the new songs are very fun to play.”